Friday, October 4, 2019

In memoriam: Ted Piwowar, 1965-2019

Ted Piwowar was one of my closest, long-term friends for over thirty years. He died on July 1st.

I didn't find out about it until September 29th.

This is something I'll get back to later in this post, but first, an introduction:

The first time I remember getting into a conservation with Ted about anything was a phone call where I tried getting a ride back from a meeting of the anime club we were both a member of back in 1985. Ted, it turns out, was voted in as the President of the Chicago branch of the C/FO (Cartoon Fantasy Organization) the previous meeting because he was sick. Yes, it literally was the "Congratulations, you're now in charge because you weren't there" excuse. Be that as it may, we were both anime fans, which was a an immediate, common bond between us. I got my ride back that night, and we kept in contact. And, in fact, became friends -  and stayed friends for over three decades, in fact.

Ted's primary interest in life was computer animation, which is the reason he had a deep and abiding interest in anime and manga in the first place. One of his greatest regrets is that he could never get his foot in the door in that industry (he certainly made enough efforts at building a body of work as a student at Columbia College and afterward), and it bothered him immensely that in the 31-plus years after he graduated he had to work in industries related to it but never in the actual industry itself. Part of his game plan was to head out to L.A. to do so. It never happened.

For years, we went to SF conventions as part of a group, Japanese bookstores, concerts at venues like Metro and Tuts or just hung out when we were too broke to do either. We kept in touch all the time, and I helped him move on more than one occasion. The one thing I didn't get to see was him succeeding at his chosen profession, though, and the problem with that was that his growing lack of long-term employability was beginning to wear on his nerves. He was a lot quicker to irritability and even anger as he got older as time and frustration wore on, and the fact that he had to move back in with family on more than one occasion didn't help matters much. He was still trying, though, despite all that.

And then, on July 1st, it all ended.

And I found out the hardest way possible, other than actually being there when the sudden heart attack apparently killed him while he was getting ready for work one morning.

It was through his Facebook wall, because no one in his family told me about this despite the fact one of his sisters got in touch with me after he went to the hospital in 2017 via text, and despite the fact they could've gone through his effects after he passed away to find out who they needed to contact. I'll remember that train ride for a very long time because of that fact. It wasn't a good feeling. Shock combined with anger never is, and that moment had enough of both.

All I know at this point is what other friends posted on his wall the day of the funeral and what two of them told me in instant messages after I contacted them. I'll try to contact his family to get a more complete picture of what happened, but as for now this is all I have to go on. And I'm leaving it at that.

All I know is that end came far too suddenly, and far too early.  He deserved a more complete memorial as well. Hopefully, I or someone else will salvage enough of his artwork to do that, but that's a subject for another time.

He just deserved better in life, period.


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